Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Disgusting mothers

Listen up, mothers.

Here are some places you should not be changing your baby's nasty diaper at the auto show:

On my display floor
On the beautiful, expensive lounge seating in my display
In the back of any of my vehicles
On my static or rotating vehicle platform
On my information desk

Why is this so g-d difficult to understand? Would you change your own dirty underwear in the middle of the grocery store? Would you purposely expose your child's genitals to a pedophile? It's the same thing!

Just because it's a baby doesn't make it any less disgusting. Do you think anyone wants to look at the giant load your kid took in his pants? Or smell it? Or be exposed to that biohazard? Your laziness - and that's all it could possibly be, because a bathroom is never more than 100 feet away - is putting the health of hundreds, if not thousands, of people at risk.

And you don't know who's looking at you when you're doing this. Do you know how many web cams are broadcasting from the Chicago Auto Show? Five. Do you know how many visitors at the auto show have cameras? All of them. Do you know what the chances are that one of them is a pervert? Pretty high, trust me on that. Do you realize you're taking a pretty big chance that one of them is going to snap a pic of your kid's junk?

Of course not. Of course you didn't think of any of those things, because you're the type of person who thinks it is perfectly okay to change your baby's diaper in the middle of the auto show.


  1. On the spinning display? Really?

    Take off the diapers on one revolution and get the new ones ready for the next?


  2. I really really wish you could tell me this wasn't true, but I don't think you can..... Omg. Ew to the extreme.

    I hate mothers who think the world/society owes them help because they decided to have kids.

  3. Dear beautifull booth babe,

    You will understand on the day you got kids too.

    On a auto show there are simply not enough facillities available for parents with little kids.

    First hand experience from dad of two kids.

    Sorry about your expensive stuff and all...

  4. Dear Anonymous, sometimes at a concert there are not enough bathrooms for the women. Rather than taking a crap on the seat next to me, I wait my turn in line.

  5. I'm a dad, too, and I've never been anywhere with too few facilities for diaper changes. If you can, go back out to your own car and change the kid. You never know; one of the ticket people might let you back in if you explain the situation. Exposing people to the stench of a Chernobyl diaper is rude and unsanitary, no matter how you slice it. The ideal situation: find a sitter, then go to the car show.

  6. The Torque Retort brings up an excellent point: why are they bringing newborns and toddlers to the car show in the first place?

    Listen parents, you decided to have a kid so start accepting the consequences and stay the fcuk home. No car shows until your offspring are old enough not to shit themselves or scratch expensive paint jobs. No movies until they can keep their traps shut. No restaurant dinners 'til they can sit quietly and eat something harder than strained peas. The truth is that most of the time you are being a bad parent and putting your own needs before your child's. As soon as you have a kid you lose the right to be selfish. That's all there is to it. No debate. Your kid would rather be home with his/her toys, special blankie and friends. So quit dragging them to places you want to be.

    You want to get out of the house sooner than that? Well then, either get a sitter/sap/Grandma and/or teach your kids manners at an earlier age. Bottomline, it's just rude and totally asinine to expect the rest of us to write you a free pass and put up with your smelly, ill-mannered brat.

    Yep, I'm one of those real rotten, selfish pricks who're sick of other people's "little blessings" infringing upon my right to have a good time as a child-free adult.

  7. So just to be clear Charles, If I can't find a sitter but my toddlers are well behaved I'm not welcome anyways. Great - you're right you are a selfish prick.

  8. No offense but IMHO your blog is taking a pretty negative tone so far. Maybe that's what your going for but it'd be interesting to have some more variety. Cheers.

  9. Kristian, the day I see a leprauchaun ride through my display on a rainbow-colored unicorn tossing gummy bears and gold coins to the happy, smiling crowd below, I'll write about it. Until then you get my reality - and this is the sad reality.

  10. lol :) I hear what your saying. Maybe I need to clean my rose colored glasses. ;) Have a good one.

  11. @ "Anonymous": Ask yourself why you're bringing a toddler to an auto show, movie, restaurant or any number of other places most little tykes find boring or scary. Is it for the kid or for yourself? If a getting out of the house to see a car show is so important to you that you'll drag a toddler to it, you need to revisit your priorities. My advice, take the kiddo to a park. They like parks.

    It's not that I don't sympathize, but you chose children. I haven't yet and I've had enough of strollers running up my heels and barking my shins. I'm tired of listening to babies cry during an R-rated movie. I don't enjoy getting caught in the crossfire of a tantrum-throwing, spaghetti-slinging brat at a restaurant.

    Just because you're pushing a stroller/toting a tyke doesn't give you the right to forget social niceties and behave like an all around jerk. When I do have children, you can be damn sure I'll put them first and avoid adult places until they're old and well-behaved enough to appreciate them.

  12. Sadly, anyone who works in the auto show industry knows all to well that DYCWTC's blog posts are only pointing out reality. At I show I worked at only a few weeks ago I saw an unsupervised child lick the badge of a Cadillac. So to many of us, it seems that parents are just one of the groups making working auto shows just a little more difficult, if not jaw dropping. Keep up the real stories DYCWTC! You can't make this stuff up!

  13. OMG, I saw a kid licking the car at my display yesterday too! What the hell?

  14. Pedophiles? Health of thousands of people at risk? I hope that's just hyperbole, otherwise I really think you need to reexamine the reasons you are upset about this.

    Is it disgusting and uncouth for parents to change their diapers on public? Yes, but that's pretty much the sole reason they shouldn't do it.

    BTW, I have three kids and I don't agree with the "when you have them you'll get it" mentality.

  15. Josh P. again let me point out the FIVE web cams broadcasting live from the auto show floor. If you think for a minute that web-savvy pedophiles don't log into such sites for the express purpose of getting their jollies, you're incredibly naive. As far as the health risk, people who will change their kid's diaper in the middle of an auto show are not exactly wiping the area down with Lysol afterwards - so yes, they are exposing thousands of other people to fecal-matter bourn diseases such as E Coli.

  16. 'Do you know what the chances are that one of them is a pervert? Pretty high, trust me on that. Do you realize you're taking a pretty big chance that one of them is going to snap a pic of your kid's junk?'

    That's an extremely provocative and dangerous comment. I work with young people and specialise in internet safety and engagement through technology, and know all too well the consequences that can arise from such a statement.

    I also know that the percentage of sexual predators who might pose a danger to children and young people is *far* lower than the media would have you believe; propagating ideas to the contrary only tends to make things worse in the long term, as people tend to avoid seeking work in the caring professions for fear of being labelled negatively. Promoting safety through education is far more useful than Breeding a culture of fear.

  17. Great, well in that case, let's everyone wave their kids naked bodies in front of web cams. *insert eye roll here*

  18. Charles, You make very good points in your second post. The fact of the matter is that if your children don't behave and you can't keep them in line then you should stay home. However I believe we live in a very awesome culture and keeping my well mannered children at home is a disservice to them and the society they will grow up in. Exposing them to these awesome automobiles (and wonderful restaurants) will help them learn to respect the rest of society instead of just growing up watching TV. For the record my kids LOVE cars. All of them (the toddlers and then 10 year old) are car nuts just like me. Trust me when I say they would have a blast at any car show. And if they were to be a problem that I couldn't control and keep from ruining anyone else's fun I would gladly leave to resolve the situation.

    The problems you hate most are not the kids. It's the parents. Getting run over by a stroller isn't a kid's fault it's the parents. And when the kids don't know how to not scream or throw spaghetti again it's not the kid's fault. It's the parents. The problem these days (as DYCWTC pointed out in her latest post) is the poor parenting so many people are showing these days.

  19. @ "Anonymous",

    Yeah, see I never said I hate the kids. As I remarked in my first comment, it's selfish parents that are the problem. The kids are just being kids. While some toddlers may dig the cars, eventually they will all grow tired of it before the parents are ready to leave. This is where the problems with tantrums and children running amok tend to begin. These parents need to learn/accept that they are there only so long as the kids want to be there.

    And, like the lady said, there are no good excuses anymore for changing a diaper in public wherever one wants.

  20. I can see the Demotivational poster now:

    Because nothing says "I want photos of my kid's junk on the internet" more than changing their diapers at a public event.

    Now we just need that photo...

  21. seriously chuckling now... (SCN?)
    Truth is, this has happened four times this season in my booth alone. Thing is, I got in trouble for herding a nursing mother (no blanket) off the stage in Texas a few years back and, as such, refuse to endanger my job with any sort of recordable confrontation with the hippie parents who think the speaking platform looks like a changing table (they're not wrong, it kinda does).


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