Monday, April 12, 2010

I don't want your man

Ladies, I need you to do me a favor. You've got to dial down the hate.

It never fails. A young couple, usually teenagers or not far from it, will stop in front of my spinning platform and while the guy asks questions (regardless of whether or not he's trying to look down my shirt) his girl is busy trying to poison me with haterade.

Honey, first of all I've got a man. He's way hotter than yours and actually pulls his pants all the way up when he gets dressed. Second of all, don't hate me because I'm beautiful. (Sorry, I've always wanted to say that!) No really, second of all, it's not my fault that your man is a dog who can't keep his eyes where they belong: on you.

The auto show is full of eye candy for men. Between the cars and the models some of them truly do not know what to do with themselves. I literally had a 12-year-old ask for my number once. (Seriously, I asked him how old he was. That's another entry for another day.) The crazy thing is that most of the product specialists, Fiat brands aside, are dressed pretty conservatively nowadays in business suits and knee-length skirts, but I can assure you that the girls who are still working in tight little dresses are giving up nothing more than a coquettish smile.

So ladies, please remember it is not my fault that your man approached me and started a conversation. In fact, it is my job to talk with him about the cars and be friendly, as long as he isn't a jackass. If you don't want to see it, don't come to the auto show. Instead, perhaps your time might be better spent working on your self esteem issues or finding a more gentlemanly man friend.

I promise, I don't want your man.


  1. Ahahahahaha!!!! Even with my Kewpie doll grin, pilgrim jacket and turtle neck I still have women who stare me down and refuse to smile at me. As if their man would even qualify for one of us spinners! And like we would ever date anyone from an auto show! Keep up the great work. :)

  2. A-freakin-men. Women are the biggest haters out of all shows...all because you can't control your man does not give you the right to take it out on us. End point!

  3. lol :) Maybe you could become a sociologist after this job.

  4. T.P. if this is your "anonymous blog" then it's hilarious... seriously; like, ROFLCOPTER, hilarious. That said, if it is not yours, then props to the writer for creating a blog; putting these stories, not in some self published vanity book hoping anybody outside the autoshow industry gives a crap, but on the web where we can share the stories with our dearest friends in the hopes that they'll see just how ridiculous our job really is.

  5. I'm not "T.P." but thank you for your compliments!

  6. to anonymous,

    who states "As if their man would even qualify for one of us spinners!"

    Get over yourself your most likely a moderately attractive woman with a good job, not the second coming of Christ,

    modesty is a virtue, try it some time

  7. I don't know what "spinners" means to you, but it was described to me as a small, thin woman. It had everything to do with the physics required in order to change positions without much effort.

  8. Yeah, NO. A "spinner" is someone who stands on the spinning turntable next to the car at the auto show.


Please leave a comment below - I do so love to hear from my public. I reserve the right to delete anything I want because it's my blog. Any guesses as to my identity will be deleted immediately. Spammers will be forced to attend a full season of monster truck rallies.